6th September 2025 - AFC Blackpool 2 v 0 Maine Road - With the climate looking to be kind to our plans we rose early, packed up and headed to Lytham St Annes. We visited a garden centre at 9am prompt, purchased a few items and had a small breakfast and coffee that set us up for the day. From here we met a couple of fine friends at nearby Lytham Hall and had a slow and steady wildlife pootle and clocked up, despite the arid conditions and disturbing tread of folks, 165 species. The cafe visit was a pleasure and I did share a cake with the good lady despite being on a health kick. Many hoverflies frequented the nearby flowers and a Painted Lady Butterfly was a bonus. The only gripe was some nearby goon waffling on about how they need to get HS2 finished as it would save him (and other deadheads) 20 minutes on a certain journey - a note was made of this strange clacking species - Idioticus twattus - I don't think it falls into the uncommon bracket.
After farewells we set off and within a matter of minutes we had parked up at the ground, had paid our fee and were perched in position with brews in hand. I like this ground, a good layout, a feeling of spaciousness and the coffee was fair enough for sure. Predictions were made, my wife fancied draw, I went for an away win, what a couple of wankers we turned out to be.
A fractured start to the game saw two teams gallop and gasp but no real upperhand had. This set theme seemed to continue for a great while and I did pessimistically wonder if we were in for a goal drought. Eventually the home team started to show greater urgency and attacking prowess when a long goal kick found No 11 (James Hughes) out wide. The player finding himself in possession got the noggin down, cut in and decided to chance matters with a low, turf skimming shot. The visiting No 1 (Oliver Brockbank) was down in plenty of time but fatally allowed the ball to squirm under his carcass and roll into the net. A crucial mistake but better early in the game than at the death.
The Road were needing to respond to this suckerpunch and rise from the canvas, gain some composure and fire back without delay. A free-kick was eventually earned, the ball entered the box, was bumbled away which allowed No 6 (Ben Mooney) to have a pop. The effort was close but not close enough and the guests continued to push into a deceptive wind that saw all high balls get diluted of threat. AFC Blackpool defended as Maine Road advanced, another dash by the Blues fizzled due to the support trotting into position and not giving the possessor of the ball any options. Matters must improve, the players needed a dose of Non-League laxatives methinks.
AFC Blackpool were showing a great adeptness at pilfering the ball and after one such thieving incident there followed some choice interplay with No 10 (Jack Banks) showcasing himself as a tricky-footed blighter. No 7 (Jacob Gregory) posted a good ball in that No 8 (Shaun Sailor) cranially connected with but not providing enough 'oomph' and making matters too easy for the keeper. The Blackpool mob came again, a cutting ball saw Gregory gather and fire but be denied by the mittman. Several minor scares came at each end, nothing to send a tremble to parts untapped though. The hosts earned a throw in that caused in-box chaos with a corner ensuing, Gregory threading to Banks who just couldn't keep his shot below the timber.
As the half wound down MR's No 7 (Loui Williams) had a pop that was abysmal, a corner for the Blues saw the hosts remain as defensively tight as Anne Widdecombe's rear end and then The Mechanics broke away, Maine Road became awash with panic, failed to deal with the danger and gave away a spot kick. Gregory stepped up to deal with matters and duly rattled the ball home to double his sides lead. In truth, the two goal advantage was more than deserved.
Just prior to the break Blackpool won a free-kick which was sent forth and flicked on by Sailor. Gregory connected , the outcome was a real close shaver that was worthy of a net buster. Alas it was not to be and Maine Road's hopes continued to hang by a thread. The referee blew for the break, we two onlookers had a wander, looking at the local flowers, enjoying the fine fresh air and finding a seating position at the opposite side of the ground. The guests really needed to turn things around here as the first half display was shabby beyond belief. AFC Blackpool just needed to keep up the work rate, remain solid and see the game through - easier said than done.
The second period began with Maine Road borne again and obviously taking heed of what I suspected was a robust half-time team talk. Either this or the threat of a visit from a Cyril Smith look-a-like had certainly put a spring in the teams step and a corner was immediately won. The delivery was choice, Mooney appeared and put in a point blank header that the keeper somehow saved. The ball went out, Williams gained possession, cultivated a shot that was mighty close indeed. Within seconds another corner came, the keeper dropped but an infringement was spotted. The Road had their tails up, a recent sub had a dig but the ball strayed wide of the mark, This was a good response though and once more the blue clad unit advanced with a ball out wide won after some hard industry. A ball came into the box, No 9 (Jack Coop) put in a header and quivered the upright - another big chance gone.
The hosts eventually had a break and earned a bonus boot. The delivery was bilge but soon after another break was had, Gregory put a swift ball in that Hughes connected with but saw the globe get deflected wide. The corner came, No 6 (Kieran Shaw) had a header but it was easily grabbed by the keeper's mitts. Two more attacks came, both snubbed out by offside decisions but the growing threat was there. The Road reacted with a corner leading to a defensive flick on that saw No 10 (Mark Pearson) volley wide - and again, the home netting survived a bulging.
Matters proceeded with a hectic tempo. Maine Road had several more pops at goal, all to no avail. Time trickled away and hope was seemingly taking a dive and considering a trip around the u-bend of abandonment when Banks committed an over-hearty tackle and was given a straight red. Was this the dangled carrot the travellers needed? There was little left on the clock, if there was going to be a turnaround then shorts, socks and surgical trusses needed hitching up.
The sky blue clad ranks came on, a free kick earned that Coop hit forth with a sugar sweet connection. A goal was anticipated but the horizontal length of timber was rattled - it was just going to be one of those days. Into added time we went, Maine Road put in a good stint but too many efforts were off target. Corners, great gallons of perspiration and much whirring leg work didn't help matters and when the referee blew it seemed only right that the points were going the way of the satsuma-coloured army. Man of the Match I reckon was duly earned by AFC Blackpool's No 5 (Anthony Pearson) - a stalwart at the back who had a good reading of the game, made sure the rank and file were organised and in the second half, pissed on the pasties of promise the opposing force were striving to serve forth. This had been a game of two halves, this chap was a standout throughout!
We wandered off and saw a few extra wild things before getting into the car and heading home. As per, a visit to AFC Blackpool is always part of a good day out, we look forward to the return.
FINAL THOUGHTS- Well, where to start with Maine Road. This was another one of those familiar Jekyll and Hyde performances that really do discombobulate the senses of logic. The first half the team were downright abysmal with no cohesion, no real flair or desire and no real threat. They were lucky to be only two down if the truth be told and maybe, a more attack minded side would have buried the game long before the 45 minute spell was up. The second half though was a real turnaround and if the lads would have bagged a draw I think no one would have had any complaints. The fact remains though, they must play like this for each and every minute of every game, any more spells like the first half stint here and any thoughts of a top ten finish can be forgotten. As for AFC Blackpool, well they are difficult to judge on this game due to the peer opposition in half one and the fact that they were on the back foot for a lot of half two. Granted, they were down to 10 men for some of the game, and they did see things out without conceding. They do seem to me a team in the process of gelling and maybe this win will begin a run of games that will earn many points. They do need to get their arses in gear though as games are slipping by and the teams at the top are building up a good head of steam. I shall be watching the next few results with my beady eye and crossing my fingers in hope. I shall also be catching up with Maine Road many times throughout the season, I may be branded a pervert for punishment looking at the way matters unfolded today - I may be wiser paying a dwarf dominatrix to throw Weebles at my nob! Many things doth wobble but will they fall down!
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