Anyway, my good lady dropped me at the ground tonight, I took my place next to my mate John D and we had a catch up. John has finally packed up with his Prosthetic Limb Agency and is now looking at growing Porn Corn - a new plant-based substance that is laden with hormones and aphrodisiacs. The only side effect is your genitals turning yellow and an increase in the chance of being bummed by the Jolly Green Giant. My diabetes diet now seems a great deal more sinister. And to the game...
...onto the softly dew-kissed baize the teams strode, both looking rather small in stature, maybe an optical illusion caused by the wintry climate and my rather off-kilter noggin. The early strainings saw the hosts hold their own and give inkling of a situation deemed 'promising' by those of a more optimistic bent. Alas for the hosts Bury were soon charging forward with the blurring shanks of No 3 (J. Webbe) hurtling away and sending forth a pop at the meshing. The ball was saved, the defending that followed was slacker than a politicians jaw and up popped No 11 (Tyler James) to bag the first strike of the night.
From this drastically bad start Maine Road were immediately put under the freshly branded cosh again with a corner won and delivered and No 4 (F. Gaulton) rising like a sexed up fruitloop on a trampoline (ooh darn this head) and putting in a free header that, luckily for the hosts, had too much elevation. The home lads responded with some perspired work but just lacked the assassins touch in the final third.
The state of play began to level out, Maine Road had a chance to bag an equaliser when a bad defensive ball landed at the feet of No 9 (Jack Coop). Time was taken to pick a pass, No 11 (Gold Badmuss) was found and after one look a shot was executed but, the ball failed to stay on target and so Bury breathed a sigh of relief. From here the guests put in a stern effort, Webbe led the next charge with a sweet weaving run. The ball was posted, confusion arose, eventually No 9 (Patrick Johnrose) had a pop on the turn and sent the globe wide. Another nifty move for Bury soon followed, Johnrose was the end component but his dig also flew wide - Maine Road were now living on the edge.
As things looked to be getting more perilous for the hosts an attack was had with Coop putting in a deft touch allowing No 7 (Jeremie Pedro) to nip in and pull the trigger. The guest No 5 (J. Gregory) stood firm and blocked, the loose ball was fizzed across goal and went dead. A free-kick for the Blues soon followed. A quick passage of play, Badmuss provided service to Coop whose fair crack just couldn't stay on target. Bury punched back, Webbe delivered, No 7 (Gerry McCullion) produced an audacious overhead that saw good contact made but the ball fly over the timber.
From here The Shakers pushed, Road No 6 (Ben Mooney) was guilty of an error and the ball was pilfered and poked forth. Mcullion had the keeper to beat and beat him he did - 0 - 2 - and well deserved.
Maine Road were clinging on now, a few free-kicks and corners came their way and they resisted further penetration. They did indeed win a corner, it was hit with good curve and pace, the guest No 1 (R. Saunders) did well to stop it from sneaking in under the crossbar. Soon after a Bury mistake was left unpunished and then a response saw Webbe put one on a plate for James who recklessly blazed over.
A few more huffs, puffs and not so close shaves and the break was upon us, the scoreline did indeed reflect matters and was perhaps a hint of more things to come. I stayed put for the break and had my last Yoghurt Bar for a while and a swill of some warming ginger. Fungalpunk may be Fungalmonk anytime soon - bless you my child.
Half two, Bury wasted no time in blasting forth via the impressive Tyler who won a corner for his troubles. In the ball went, the keeper failed to collect, Johnrose had a shot which was deflected over and the next angled hoof was survived. The hosts looked to build from the back, a pass was made to the keeper, the first touch was shabby and the predator that is Johnrose scented a chance, nipped in, pilfered and tapped the ball home to kill the game stone dead. A cruel blow indeed but if you dangle your conkers too many times you are sure to pay a heavy price and become one nut-short.
Maine Road now tried to summon some ray of hope with No 3 (Connor Clark) having a fair chance after a jigging run but failing to find the all important onion bag. Bury were reactivated once more, a ball was held up with authority, touched off to James who let fly a venomous sizzler that bulged the netting and rounded off a quite rewarding session of play. A fine goal that lad, a real humdinger.
From here the game fizzled out for a lengthy period with subs aplenty, a few injury breaks and no real high end action. Due to this lack of thrill I was made more aware of the first tendrils of cold creeping up the trouser leg in the hope of numbing the nethers. Thank goodness for my double-layered Frank Bough Thermals - they were slightly bald at the front but were still doing the business.
Into the arse end of the affair we went, it seemed goals were now a far away prospect with the closest we came being a shot from Road's Sub that was firm enough but tidily saved and a return hoof from the Shaker's that struck a bonce at the back of the goal. A stunning move by the visitors came next, the flank was blazed, tackles rode and a cross posted but the wannabe killer could only connect and send the ball into the heavens.
I was ready to put the pen and paper down when Maine Road won a free-kick. The postal service was decent, a nut across goal came, a moment of havoc and a spare man for the Blues, namely No 3 (Jake Pogson) fired home. This was a shocker and all too late but the home lads had their peckers up (ooh on such a cold night too) and a long ball saw all heads missed, and the substitute collect and rifle in a good punt that the mittman turned behind for a corner. The booting from the angle came, a smattering of uncertainty invaded the box and up popped super-sub Jamie Schofield to touch home. 2 - 4 - and the goal average was upped but any thoughts of a comeback were derailed as the referee blew for full time a few seconds later.
I wasted no time in getting back to the car, I was a trifle tired and my good lady had brought me some toast - wholemeal bread tha' knows and cholesterol lowering butter - thankfully I grabbed a handful of grass from the pitch and added that as an extra treat - Non-League calories - only the best. Man of the Match, I nearly forgot - I reckon it is mighty fair in giving it to Bury Town's No 7 (Tyler James) - swift, strong and with an awareness of what is going on around him. with 2 goals bagged as a bonus - nah tha' can't fault that.
FINAL THOUGHTS - Well, there ain't a lot to add here. Bury FC were expected to win and win they did. At times they were quick and slick and opened up the Maine Road team like a fishmonger filleting a Haddock. One or two players really caught the eye and there was a good understanding throughout the ranks that made this a quite efficient and well-oiled performance. The late goals they let in can be a reminder that concentration must last the full game but other than that, roll on Bury and keep doing what ya do. Maine Road are on a bad run, this game was a free-hit though and I reckon they are better off out of all cups so they can concentrate on their precarious league position. Their next 6 games will answer some serious questions with the one against Garstang a must-win match I reckon. All teams hit a bad patch but without any attention they can become a contagion and a serious rot can set in. Come the other side of Christmas we will see if the Maine Road timbers are shaking or the season has turned around - I like a bit of DIY Rot and Roll, I do hope The Blues avoiding the decay process.
No comments:
Post a Comment