Sunday 9 December 2018

OSWEST-THREE AS THE VAUX ARE POPPED

8th December 2018 - FC Oswestry Town 3 v 1 Vauxhall Motors - A change of plans was had on the morn of the game as the weather was looking rather shifty and our planned game was in danger of being called off (later that day we found out it had been postponed, the decision was a choice one).   'Head southward' was the final decision and at 7.45am we set off in dirty weather looking forward to the day ahead.  First port of call was Chirk Castle where we wandered for 3 hours and saw a few nice birds, clocked up 81 species of fungi and I exposed myself to a vicar who was out for a morning run.  It was a political gesture and aimed to keep the man of the cloth pure - thank goodness my wife was with me to hold the brolly and fungi box whilst I dropped the trollies - she is a supportive old soul and always willing to help me pay the odd fine or two.  Eventually all was tucked in, we arrived at the car and had a warm drink and some spiced ginger biscuits that were ruddy scrumptious.  The drive to The Venue was short and done under rainbow streaked skies and we duly entered and had a warm meal to revive the soul.  Pasta and garlic bread for the good lady (she's a veggie tha' knows), Gammon, 2 fried eggs chips and peas for me (I am a fatty tha' knows).  With tea swilled we were doped up but forced the issue and took our seats on the balcony overlooking the pitch and awaited the game proper - here is what we got for our money!

A fuss-free start saw both teams play at a very sedate pace and look to settle-in to the game proper.  The O's No 7 (Harry Bower)  was the first player to hold threat when he picked the ball up in a very innocuous position and rolled forward like a stone intent on flattening some moss.  He was given time to trespass and consider a shot from range which he duly took with both greedy feet.  The ball was struck, looped at the last and dropped into the net over the disconcerted keeper - a peach of a strike, game on.  The next action wasn't far away with a home goal kick sweetly touched on by their robust No 11 (David Howarth) that led to a short cross with No 4 (Michael O'Reilly) lashing one without apology.   The startled mittman parried and the pressure was partially relieved but moments later, after the guests had a rare flurry, the potential was snuffed out and a long hoof from the rear culminated in a strong crack from No 10 (Ryan Jones).  The mittman punched away, the VM engine was just ticking over, a spark was very much needed to get the Motors properly running.  Another scarce attack saw No 10 (George Hassel) released and duly cross but the header that came was too light and wasn't even close to the strike zone.  Oswestry were still ravenous and No 9 (Liam Parry) exuded hot determination and cut in at the angle before letting fly.  Again the keeper was called into action and tidily tipped over.  The corner came, discomfort caused and as the ball went out and came back in Hassell was in to knock over from mere inches out.  

The visiting team were now nudging back into this one and were building with patience and looking to cross at the first opportunity.  A hit and miss period followed and equilibrium suppressed excitement.  The Vauxhall lads won a corner which came but was nutted disappointingly over by the effective and efficient No 8 (Haydn Cooper).  The half continued without incident, the rain now lashed down and the cold started to creep in - we must be mad. Suddenly, from nothing, the travelling No 7 (Joe Brandon) fired and forced the keeper to save. No 11 (Damas Kiwanda) retrieved on the flank, jinked in and put in a sizzling cross that was connected with by the predatory Hassell.  It was perfect timing and with 3 minutes left of the first half it really put the result up for grabs.  At the death the same team nearly snatch a lead goal when a cross was poorly defended and Kiwanda just missed a half-chance - now that would have been a sickener and a surprise,   The referee blew - this wasn't a classic but there was much to ponder.

Me and my good lady had a brew and shared a Boost Bar, by crikey that is a good lump of chocolate if ever I tasted one.  As we huddled up the teams came back out, take yer pick folks, it was all down to who wanted it most!

The second period began with little in it, No 8 (Christopher Craven) nearly got the third strike with an outrageously audacious floater from a fair distance indeed.   Time stood still the visiting keeper kept his peepers on the ball and did enough to tip onto the bar and then safely gather and spare any blushes.  Jones had another dig soon after but the save was comfortable and then he had a second bite of the cherry when a free-kick was wonderfully delivered for him to only miss the target.  No 9 (Benjamin Greenop) for the Motors could have also grabbed that crucial third goal when he put crust on ball from a floating kick inwards.  The downward force was too strong and the ball hit the deck and pinged over much to the relief of the goal guardian. Chances now became scarce, Parry had a dig out of the blue but could only hit the keepers carcass and then the same player put nut on ball soon after but this time was inches off target.  A pause in play was followed by a razor onslaught by the hosts.  The ball went out wide, the cross hurtled in and Bower appeared from nowhere and slammed the ball home - it was the spark needed and a fist up the rear of the opposing team.  The dynamics were now altered, Vauxhall Motors needed a gear change and a push on the accelerator or FC Oswestry would be gone into the wild grey murk with all three points tucked in their jockstraps.

The Motormen now advanced, Kiwanda worked in but the ball would just not settle.   Eventually, from knotted shanks, the cross came and No 16 (Ben Holmes) got a shot away...but just shy of the sticks it went.  We now entered the final phase, the guests were making all the running and dictating the tempo with their Captain Cooper, putting in some rewarding work.  A quite scintillating passing move was cultivated from the fields of desperate hope, the O's stayed composed, pissed on the new shoots of belief and planted their own seeds of promise via a break with Parry galloping like a farmer with the shits and eventually squirting one that went just shy of the far timber.  The Vaux pushed back, urgency was needed, they were caught napping at the back and a defender was pickpocketed and Howarth tried a long ranger, it was unfortunate not to kill the game dead.  Into the dog end of the game, as The Town remained calm and neatly absorbed a ray of light was spotted, they dashed for glory with an attack akin to an hormonal dragon, full of fiery desire.  The culmination was a well taken goal by Craven, much to the delight of his colleagues.  It was a fine way to finish and during the few seconds that remained the visitors offered little to lessen the lead...and we were done.  A tough game and a grinding effort but for me the points went the right way and the team that won produced the better quality at the right times. Man of the Match goes to FC Oswestry's No 7 (Harry Bower) who displayed some fine footwork, exposed a great inner desire and ran himself ragged for the Non-League cause.   He did so with little fuss and got a well earned goal - well played sir!  Cold and tired we headed home, it was a long drive but it had been a good day all round, until next time!

FINAL THOUGHT - And so to the end consideration and it goes something like this. Vauxhall Motors seemed off colour today, their paintwork looked scuffed, the steering out of sync and they seemed to have very few options when it came to gear changing.  The exhaust needs blowing out, the windscreen cleaning and a clearer view had of where they want to go and how they want to get there had.   The league position informs that they are better than this but if care is not taken, the crankshaft held in check before you know it the wheels can come off and you can end up in a lay-by of no hope.  They play Maine Road next, a very hit and miss team, there is a chance there to repeat this minor blip but if they ain't on it from the start the hazard lights will be flashing.  FC Oswestry have much to build on here and play in a very unruffled manner and can win with graceful aplomb or, like a masturbating Quasimodo, grind one out in ugly fashion. Today they did just enough and what was asked of them and seem to have a good moral within their ranks that will undoubtedly serve them well over the mid-winter period.   It can be a trying time for teams, turning out on Grade-A grey days, freezing one's chuff off and getting kicked to buggery when they could be sat at home with a bag of chips and a warm cuppa whilst reading about the love-triangle of Elton Welsby, Lawrie McMenemy and Billie Jean King - Oh what babies came from that mess.  The enthusiasm to get up and play is applauded from this end and they were good value for their win today, it goes without saying we will catch them again, let us see how things transpire.

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