17th October 2020 - Lostock Gralam 3 v 0 Knutsford FC - Up and dabbling - the recent fungus list was updated to 103 species with several county 'firsts' in the mix. Hours of microscopy was needed to compile the total but I got there with a few pesky species eluding the ID process and shrivelling before I could get to them. After a busy morn my wife and my spore-laden self set out to this new ground, got mucked around by the in-car SatNav but eventually made it in time to have a brew, a choccy bar, acquire pics of teamsheets and have a catch up with the roaming STP Stu. All 3 of us were agreed that this was a fine set up and of a fairly picturesque standard - the added Shaggy Ink Caps and Pleated Ink Caps were a mere bonus. We headed to the small stand to watch the game, the clouds were not to be trusted and besides, it had a seating area where we could take shelter if precipitation did occur or if the old boiled eggs (legs) started griping. We didn't have long to wait for the teams to make an appearance - I was prepared to scribble again, this is what the ink was seen to say.
After some good galloping the hosts won an early corner that entered the box, was played out and rattled back from distance by No 10 (Liam Collins). The keeper read matters and held the travelling globe with relative ease. The visitors were unsettled, a bad defensive pass was pilfered, the home No 11 (Joseph Woolley) was played in and looked to penetrate but was swiftly neutered as the offside flag was waved. Eventually the guests won a free-kick, No 11 (Matt Hanson) could only strike the wall and watch as the Lambs went on a breakaway. A ball was played forth, Collins chased but looked to be too late as keeper and defender closed in. The two marshalling men however collided, the ball squeezed free and Collins duly fed on the scraps and slotted home - 1 - 0, the touch-paper was lit.
The hosts were now on it, another attack came after much battling. The ball went out wide and a delicious delivery followed. No 9 (Jack Woolley) escaped the rear ranks, the chance to shoot was delayed by a fraction of a second which gave the mittman just enough time to come out and snaffle up the sphere. Within the twitch of a nervous man's nob Joseph Woolley was in again after No 7 (Ryan Jackson) produced a choice twist and turn, fed his comrade and watched him fire straight at the goalie. This was a good stint to say the least.
Knutsford managed to get a grip on matters next with a decent passing sequence deserved of a better punctuation mark than No 3's (Dan Quinn) belt over. The Gralam Gang were quick to reply, a streaking move saw Joseph Woolley on the flank, provide a swift cross which No 9 (Jack Woolley) struck first time albeit with little gumption and no direction - the man between the sticks had no problems snuffing matters out.
Knutsford had a free-kick and corner next, both caused little fuss for the zoned-in home ranks. These 2 gratis gifts did lead to a session of pressure but Lostock stood firm due to great discipline and a deep-rooted work ethic. The guests had another break before the half-time respite, a low shot was deflected wide and the corner booted long with No 4 (Adam McGeoghegan) not even close with his nutted attempt. Just shy of the interval Lostock posted another ball into the danger zone with the opposing defence getting their K'nut's in a knot and nearly scoring an own goal - luckily they survived and soon after...it was time for tea.
A wander, drinks acquired and we had barely returned to out seats when the teams were ready to roll once more. The questions were - Would the Grey Lambs gambol on or slip up and have their tails docked or would Knutsford strain their knackers to get back into this one or end up rupturing their own sense of rhythm - either way, this was an enjoyable game thus far and more of the same would suffice.
The Knuts Nomads started this second period brightly, Lostock though mopped up with undue fuss, ignited a spark and dashed forward with obvious threat. A run and cross were quality laden, Jackson waltzed in, remained cool and stroked home. This was looking like a very comfortable performance. Lostock Gralam applied more pressure, akin to a half-nelson applied to the throat of Jackie Pallo by the butter-haired bugger Mick McManus. Knutsford made 3 substitutions in one go, a game changer or an indication of desperation - who knows but if one more wrong move was had they would be losing this one by three submissions and one great fall.
We progressed into the bout, the guests had a corner hoofed straight at the keeper, the home lads won a free-kick which Collins cracked at the No 1 who fumbled and allowed Collins to poke home and knock the stuffing out of the opposing force.
A battling session ensued, Collins had a pop pushed wide, a corner came and caused chaos and then the ball was buried in the net but the liner saw an infringement and called for offside. Knutsford had a bonus boot punched away, a rebuild came with a cute ball over the top. No 17 (Carl McCurrie) was on it, the shot was true, the mitter stretched and pushed over. The corner produced sod all but soon after No 16 (Charlie Rodick) was slipped through with the player picking his spot but denied by the gloved guardian's outstretched shanks. Well spread that man, well spread.
From here the game had balance but Lostock looked in control. Joseph Woolley had a shot dragged wide, the home keeper got clattered and then No 15 (Danny Adjekum) dashed like a demon with a freshly peppered pecker and placed the ball on a plate for Joseph Woolley to bury - alas the shot went shy of the target, I suspect my remark about a seasoned sausage didn't help matters.
The final splutterings came, Lostock's No 12 (Miles Wady) produced a defensive header that nearly ruptured his own goal and then a shot by No 17 (Bradley West) flashed across the goalmouth with No 14 (Barney Wynne) having a follow-up shot that trembled the vertical. That should have been the fourth, it wasn't and a few kicks later we were done. Man of the Match was an easy choice, No 3 (Robbie Jones) of Lostock Gralam was utterly faultless and put in a capital stint with a calm and confident approach that showed how the game can be played with focus and good effort. I always like a sure-footed defender who plays at his own pace - today was such an example.
We strolled around the ground after the match whereupon I spied 4 leaf galls and a fellow in the shrubbery doing nude press-ups and reciting the Lostock Graham team in reverse order. Apparently something satanic was going on and the host team were being granted favour by the horned master due to these naked exercises and bizarre incantations. It takes all sorts folks - I'll stick to being a Sikh, tis a shame I sold my turban to pay for the entrance fee - hey ho, Non-League over religion any day!
FINAL THOUGHT - Firstly and to Knutsford FC - a team not at the races today and just lacking in creativity and general 'oomph'. From the off they were kept on the back peg, they looked to be playing too narrow at times and when in a commanding position on the park just lacked any viable options. There is work to be done here, work that will need attention to detail and some special sharpness added to the off-the-ball awareness. This is Knutsford though, a club with a long history of being a good Cheshire League side - they will get things right, that is for sure. Lostock Gralam were very good value today and were simply on top in all areas. If the shooting boots were really on fire today they could have bagged a half dozen (if not more) but to be fair, 3 goals, a clean sheet and many good performances is nothing to criticise. The fact they played some good football, have a fine ground and set up and when summer time comes, have some great 'perches under the birches' to enjoy means that we shall return and offer our support - I am already looking forward to it.
I was quite taken by today's ground, it is now one of my current faves, I shall continue pootling about and supporting these real and genuine places - with my punk spirit the premiership is poison and Non-League is the only way - today has once again reinforced why!
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