And so, we arrived at the club early, had a brew, conducted our pootling, returned and had a chat with Maine Road Reserve Coach Darren Jones, a fine amiable chap, trying to do something positive and eager to get his arse in gear. After the jaw wag me and the missus sat in a bowling hut and had a bite to eat before having a natter with the day's referee - another nice bloke helping keep this game moving. Eventually the players were out, the few in attendance were in position and we were pitchside with the grandad of The Roads No 10 (Joshua Clegg) - and good company he was.
The game began on the stroke of 2pm, a mere 30 seconds had passed before Moore United attacked down the flank with No 11 (James Sowerby) delivering a choice cross that No 7 (Dylan Glass) connected with and fluffed but duly jabbed home at the second time of asking. Was this the quickest goal in Cheshire League history? If so, will the ghosts of Ross and Norris McWhirter be summoned to verify this claim and would the spirit of Roy Castle do a tap-dance in celebration? Either way - Maine Road reserves looked as though they couldn't give a toss and weren't impressed by this early kick up the arse.
Moore continued to be the more animated pack and repeatedly advanced with notable purpose. A gratis hoofing was earned, No 10 (Tom Smith) posted onto the cranium of No 9 (Kane Hackett) who disappointingly nutted the globe over the timber. The hosts came again, Hackett put in a troublesome cross that saw the Maine Road defence get their knickers in a twist and snap a few elastics. Somehow the trailing teams gonads of fear were tucked in and the danger was dealt with.
Maine Road eventually found their feet on the uneven and adhesive surface. Clegg was on the end of an overhit free-kick and duly darted and won a corner. The angled punt was caught by the wind and looked to be curling into the far corner of the meshing but the inside of the post was unkind and the ball bounced to safety. Moore broke with rapid pace, a cross came and two wannabe assassins flew in to make that all-important killer contact - the final touch never came.
Again the resident ranks poured forth with No 8 (Jordan Rudge) and Glass linking up with the former player having a pop that had a trifle too much elevation. Maine Road, in return, put together a sweet passing move that ended in a free-kick decision. The attempt on goal from a standing ball was ruddy poor and punishment was duly issued as Moore attacked and wellied the ball from one side of the pitch to the other. A cross came. Hackett launched himself like a pseudo Bob Latchford and executed a flying header to double the lead - the guests looked gutted.
The game entered the final third of the first period. More assaults on the MR goal came with headers and shots dealt with but all sending a strong message that the home team were hungry for more. No 2 (Chris Slater) came close but had a brace of efforts blocked and Road in return had a weak penalty shout after No 11 (Joesef Aloush) went down like a poleaxed piss-pot and Clegg had a pop on goal, but the unforgiving pitch saw the ball bobble and end up flying into the now bracing air.
Half done, we headed back to the hut beside the bowling green and had a warm drink and a choccy bar. A sit out of the wind with my best mate was grand and by heck the Bounty Bar was smashing.
Back out for the second half we went to witness Maine Road playing a perilous passing game at the back and not showing any urgency to advance. Possession was eventually lost, Rudge supplied Hackett who sent the ball into the box where Glass was denied on the line. A corner ensued and Hackett connected with his noggin but sent the ball wide. Maine Road were like Naughty Norman Price in a memorable episode of Fireman Sam (no, not the one where he got bummed) and were playing with fire.
The hosts sensed another goal was about to be gained but the closest they came was when No 6 (Jack Lawrence) had a long range drive just bend away from the target zone. The blue clad team tried to up the ante but were lacking composure and an all round sharpness. Too many times they lost 50/50 balls and a lack of off the ball work was costing them dear.
Another corner came for Moore with the guest keeper doing well to punch and then hold the follow-up shot. The Road kept huffing and puffing with No 12 (Zach Curtis) having a pop wide and then another shot that brought the home keeper into his first bit of action of the day. The save was regular - nothing more, nothing less.
The game bundled on, from a midfield mire one of the red clad residents was released and had only the keeper to negotiate. The attacker's first touch was shabby, the mitted man collected the ball with great relief. A corner the same way came soon after, an ambitious gent tried to execute a hopeful overhead with the result a punt off target and a ruptured scrotum. Some route one football followed with the Moore keeper booting long and Rudge chasing and looking destined to score from 5 yards out. Inexplicably the post was struck and I am still wondering how he missed it!
With time running out the scoreline looked settled but on the 90th minute Clegg for Maine Road was in possession out wide, sent in a teasing cross that No 8 (Sam Barnett) bumbled into the net. 2 - 1 and thoughts of a comeback were on, but banished seconds later when the full-time whistle blew. I think the deserved side won and their No 8 (Jordan Rudge) a good choice for Man of the Match. A brilliant work ethic, some all round effective movement and a willingness to get stuck in all over the park - a choice stint.
FINAL THOUGHT - a ragged match on a testing playing surface with both teams at the bottom end of the league and looking to build some late season impetus. Maine Road were disorganised and out of sync today and looked like a team in need of some serious attention. Commitment to loose balls was lacking, not enough verbals left players in possession not knowing what to do next and a willingness to run off the ball for the full 90 minutes wasn't there. On the plus side, there were many players on show capable of skilful touches and appearing to have the ability to up their game and their sides fortunes - here's hoping. Moore Utd wanted this and worked hard from the off. The desire got them through a tricky fixture that was lacking in general flair and delicacy of touch. The key, when in the mire, is to just dig deep and give it 100% - I think the long ball game is an option here and when the back is up against the wall - kick big chaps, kick big. Sometimes winning ugly is the only way - just ask Quasimodo about the time he won the jackpot on Liberace's One Armed Love Bandit - ooh err!
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