The morn was sedate, me, my wife and daughter pootled around Chorlton, purchased a few books and sundries, had a walk on the local park and indulged in a sun-kissed meal from the ever-reliable Tibetan Kitchen - by heck it was utterly wondrous scran that sat in the gut whilst bringing almost orgasmic joy. From here we had a quick stroll and then I was dumped at football where I purchased another coffee and had a grand chat with the lass who serves and smiles and helps make Maine Road FC a welcome place.
Eventually I was out in the open air, reading about Grasshoppers and soaking up the rays. A quick chat with Road's Ben Mooney and I had a stroll. I noted some birdlife - Redwings, Common Gulls, Mistle Thrushes, Starlings and a few others. I was soon back in my chosen spot, nattering to a trio of keen Atherton LR lads who were loving their football. Predictions were made, a couple of us went for a 2-2 draw, little did we know how bad Maine Road would be during the first 45 minute stint.
From the kick off ALR began with an eye-catching urgency and endeavour. Maine Road looked mightily rattled and were struggling to settle. An Atherton ball came, No 10 (Thomas Romano) was found and left with work to do. Great feet were used to negotiate two players, the keeper posed a problem but the ball was fired home and the resident team and fans, were left reeling.
The onus was now on MR to try and force the play and make sure this game didn't slip away before it had even started. A throw in came high up the park, Romano, for the guests, led a lightning break and was unlucky not to go all the way. An injury, the game soon restarted, Romano was at it again and winning a free-kick. The outcome of this gratis hoofing was a shot straight into an opposing player - I think 'shite' is the word needed here.
The Atherton lads continued to dictate, much to the delight of the three hollering lads who I nattered with and who made the occasional racket via their enthused gobs. Against the grain though the sky-blue squad pounced. No 9 (Kaine Williams) battled away with sound endeavor and found No 11 (Jean Jacques-Kirongozi). A shot came, the save was sweet, a header from mere feet out was made by No 10 (Mark Pearson) and somehow the ball missed the target - for me this was a real game changing moment, Maine Road could very well pay a huge price for this. The punishment nearly came when we immediately scooted up the other end with a close in header passing the wrong side of the upright by mere inches - this was a very decent game, but would it be a decent day for the hosts, already I was thinking 'not'.
The Road squandered another chance soon after, somehow won a corner which was soiled by too many horrid touches. Another corner was abysmal and then we repeated the same scenario at the opposite end of the pitch. The globe was hoofed high, all peepers in the box stood and watched as the spherical object descended like a forced turd from a constipated eagle's arse. The outcome - a goal straight from the angle - what a fuckin' shambles for the defending pack, what bonus joy for the team in the lead. No 3 (Harvey Brookes) was having it, a late Christmas present methinks, old Santa Claus must be feeling generous.
So, 0-2 it was and after Maine Road were caught dwelling on matters at the rear the Laburnum lads galloped, No 2 (George Chadwick) found himself in possession of the shooting sphere and executed a quite perfect shot that found the bottom corner and finished the game in no uncertain terms.
A combative period ensued, a few shots were had without causing any keeper concern. The hosts were becoming irate, No 8 (Yousif Yousif) had a moment of spleen venting and was sin-binned. The player exchanged verbals with the ALR lads nearby, it was hardly helping the cause. No 11 (Brandon Dawson) for the visitors put his head on a cross from No 7 (Joe Bacon) but couldn't keep the ball down and seconds later, the first half was done.
For the break I indulged in a Holly-watering Arthur Bliss, supped some pop, nibbled a Granola bar and pondered how bad Maine Road had been during the first half. It was an unforgivable stint, the concentration off the ball was woeful and just the all round lack of cohesion indicative of a team whose campaign was liable to fall apart. The manager must have been akin to a donkey's aroused pecker during the half time interval - trembling with emotion, becoming a deeper shade of purple by the second and liable to fuck anyone who was brave enough to dangle a carrot of disagreement. I watched the two teams come back out, all the home players seemed to be walking OK - phew, asses with asses intact methinks.
Period two began with The Road looking a better team all round. A choice ball from Yousif brought hope but Williams just failed to arrive in time and turn executioner. A corner for the same team followed. The ball in was sweetly struck, the guest keeper though produced some fine hands and quelled any threat. Once again the hosts came on, a free-kick was posted, some confusion arose and a touch to goal went just wide. This was a great response after the horrible first half - applause to all for the effort.
The boys of Brantingham Road were now passing well and holding form, although they did allow their opponents a brief break that ended in a shot by No 9 (Harvey Sample) that was fortunately lacking in welly and wide of the mark.
15 minutes of the second half whizzed by, the result was perhaps set in stone but this was now more about Road's character than anything else. As I pondered matters the resident ranks attacked. A ball was played, Williams was suddenly the owner of the globe, had a quick peek at the target and walloped home. The response and work effort certainly deserved it, but could the lads add another quick strike and really put the wind up the Athy Lads jacksies?
Some good end to end action came in what was now a balanced contest. Time was a serious enemy to all comeback hopes and ALR nearly added further cement to their advantage when a corner came and No 4 (Lewis Adams) put in a solid and accurate header. The home No 1 (Oliver Brockbank) reacted well and made a fine save that led to a Maine Road break which ended with a somewhat duff final ball.
As the blue sky faded so did the sky blue's hopes. Pearson chased a ball, put in a chip that struck the bar and that was indeed that. Huffs and puffs with no real threat posed and the final whistle brought a close to play. The Man of the Match for me was Atherton Laburnum Rover's No 10 (Thomas Romano) for the time he spent on the pitch and his breathless efforts, the danger posed and his commitment to the cause that resulted in an effective first half for his team and a goal for himself. Many teams are going to find this bloke a pain in the arse for sure, and in a completely non-sexual way - crikey.
From here I went for a coffee with the lasses and then attended my latest Fungalised gig - the Scouse Twats Invasion - it was a cracker.
FINAL THOUGHTS - Atherton Laburnum Rovers look set for promotion, they are a team who start mighty fast and once they have the advantage they look a tough unit to peg back. All is not as rosy as it seems as the second half saw Maine Road more than hold their own, so this may be a warning to the guests not to rest on their laurels and to see the campaign out with some darn hard work and cohesion. If they do this, I reckon premier league football awaits - and that will be another new test but well deserved. Maine Road get on my tits. They play some good football at times and then somehow manage to plunge the depths and look like a team in disarray. I think any hopes of promotion are now gone, the key is to use the rest of the season to build confidence, iron out some real flaws and to play with a relaxed and sanguine manner. The crucial areas for me are the 'off-the-ball' work and the vision when in possession. If they finish in the top half this time around it will be a fair do, next year though Fungal demands. Only a play-off spot will suffice or I will be bombarding all members of the MR set up with vile abuse, half-cooked onions and, worst of all, signed close-up photographs of my perineum and ringpiece - they have been warned.
