PRE-EASTER UPCHUCK

29th March 2018 - 1874 Northwich 1 v 2 Irlam FC - The Easter period is upon us, who will get their eggs of success fertilised and who will have them cracked open for the yolks of misery to run bare.  Tis a tricky period at the best of times, with the current backlog of games many a team is under the cosh and in danger of becoming scrambled rather than nicely boiled.  We now had 4 days off work, arrived home, had a nibble and set out.  The roads were average, people flitting here and there within these clogging arterial networks where fumes spill and precious bugs get choked - I could go off on a rant here, I shall behave.  We arrived, purchased chips, took in the atmosphere, had a quick chat with the Irlam Club Secretary and awaited the night's soccerised session.  I am ruddy fagged out at the mo, I need a tonic - a local deviant suggested breast milk and cod liver oil blended with a tin of pilchards - I am happy being fagged out!  The arses were parked, the legs stretched, the two sides appeared.  Ink was spilled on paper, if one took time to decipher I think they would come up with a tale that panned out as thus:-

The opening sortie came via No 7 (Marcus Perry) for The Mitchells whose pace won the battle of the shanks but whose end shot was pulled wide of the opposing upright.  At the other end, it was No 7 (Shelton Payne) who cut in and sent in a rasping bender (no, not Larry Grayson with wind) and forced the keeper into making a solid save.  From the corner a rough tackle saw a free-kick arise at the corner of the box and when the ball was played it was threat free and easily cleared by the organised guests.  A tackle by the Irlam No 4 (Charlie Doyle) brought howls of protest from the home fans but it was a case of a good ball winning effort made nasty by a greasy pitch the player could not use to apply the brakes.  1874 soon recovered composure and the ball, before No 3 (Matthew Russell) tested the visiting No 1 (Lee White) with a belted long ranger that maybe lacked direction but certainly didn't lack bite.  The goalkeeper easily blocked and no doubt his hands were warmed for the rest of the night.  From the equilibrium of the affair Irlam exploded into action and the 74 crew fell into disarray.  Perry fired a shot across the goal, a follow-up shot was missed and then No 11 (Matthew Boland) had a second dig and snatched the first strike of the game.  It was a good finish, the 1874 lads now had another mountain to climb.

The home crew pushed hard, No 9 (Kyle Riley) absolutely hammered one and the save that followed was of outstanding quality.  The kick from the angle was had, a shot came but the netman easily gathered, the danger was temporarily halted.  The home crowd now became vociferous, a horn was blown by what seemed to be a troubled asthmatic. The last time I heard a call like this was when a lusting Hippo was eyeing the possibilities of making a move on the rear end of Bernard Manning - how distressing for the Hippo!  The Green Army now moved higher up the park, Irlam looked to soak up and spring back thus giving the game further depth. The hosts now won a free-kick, the delivery was sumptuous, the nod on goal precise and the save concrete.  The delivery came, the Blues punted away, 1874 were building the pressure, Irlam were proving that they were no mugs and could certainly hold their own.  In fact the next attack came their way when No 15 (Timothy Kinsella) sizzled down the flank, put in a worthwhile cross that No 9 (Haydn Foulds) nutted just off target - aaagghh - that was a chance to add salt in an open 74 wound for sure.  The last action of the half soon came, Northwich were sprung into further animation and when a corner was taken, the ball nutted out and then given a full on volley by No 4 (Daniel Thomas) I thought the equaliser had been had. Incredibly the crust of Boland was there to knock the ball off the line, it was a game-saving moment and made sure his team went into the break with the crucial advantage.

Half-time - tea and a cookie based chocolate bar - ruddy lovely.  We chilled and watched the rain fall, would Spring ever arrive?

The start to the second half was slow, an 1874 deflected shot brought the first spark and the first  reason for the home support to start hollering again.  From the corner Irlam broke, the opportunity looked promising but fizzled out and the hosts were allowed to dictate the opening passage of play.  Suddenly a killer pass put the Irlam No 3 (Joel Amado) on the back foot and his mistimed tackle brought a kerfuffle, a booking and, most crucially of all, a penalty.  The spot kick was taken by No 9 (Kyle Riley), it was a far from convincing effort but somehow managed to squeeze past the keeper.  1 - 1 we were and with all to play for on this wet Thursday night in Cheshire.  A quiet period came, each team were trying to work up a lather and go for the jugular.  From the calm came a storm, Irlam prowled and then sprang, Kinsella set the ball up for No 14 (Connor Martin) who needed no further invite but struck with force and left the keeper with little chance.  It was a pearling hit home and brought renewed life to an already fascinating match-up.  

The back stretch now saw urgency invade the home ranks with corners and crosses aplenty coming forth but all being dealt with by a hard-working Irlam unit.  Action came both ends, Perry for Irlam was nearly put through but the ball just had too much pace and a 74 cross followed and was nutted toward goal but was yet again cleared.  Irlam reacted, they raced away and a hard shot was executed.  The one handed save by the home No 1 (Gregory Hall) was outstanding and when Perry raced in and let fly his second block was absolutely brilliant - good work that man, and if the home lads get anything from this game this is the moment that matters.  During the final throes the green-clad unit strove to find some magic, they put numerous balls in and a final nut over was disappointing, the referee blew and Irlam had earned a strong 3 points against a side very much on the ropes.  The Man of the Match was pondered, the No 2 (Sam Bolton) certainly deserves the nod for exemplifying everything good about his team tonight - determined, tireless and effective when it matters this was a stint to savour, if it continues the lad will be a fine asset to applaud.

FINAL THOUGHT - A week ago 1874 Northwich had big dreams and were looking to have a rose-tinted season, and now they look a rushed and ragged bunch relying on instincts to keep some semblance of form.  They are a tremendous side though and I reckon this time next year, if players remain and the fixtures are kind, they will be on top of the pack and pushing for promotion.  I have seen them quite often and my confidence is not based on friendly wishful thinking - they have a good set up and are well supported, vital ingredients in making a real honest mark in these ever competitive leagues.  Irlam, just 7 days ago were pondering avoiding the relegation zone after a campaign that has seen some deserved ups and some unexplainable downs.  They will not go down, that is a surefire fact and I reckon, given tonight's effort and show of balls out passion, they can make their own impression in the league next year and put the wind up many opposing forces.  Again another team with a sound supporting cast and some decent fans, they play the game well and have some sincere class in their midst - I for one will be on the touchline next year adding my support, as I do as best as I can for all - it keeps me out of trouble anyway!