PRE-FESTIVE TUSSLE

21st December 2019 - Wythenshawe Amateurs 0 v 2 Eccleshall FC - I woke up today the veritable 'Gunky Monkey' with a sore throat and a bonse full of cloying snot.  My head was spinning, another night of mind-molesting mares saw one dream conjure up visions of me lying in a sweat-soaked bed with a giant leech beneath the covers for company that had only malevolent thoughts on its primitive vindictive mind.  As one can imagine I woke with a petrified todge doing its best 'Acorn Impression' and a tense-laden carcass that really did need a good shaking up.  The morn was spent tidying, doing the previous night's gig review which involved 2 bands called 'Wolf Bites Boy' and Grade 2' and many fine faces all swilling and nattering whilst enjoying the noise avalanche on show.  Following a good dinner my wife returned home after a shopping trip with (add own brass fanfare) my fine daughter who was back from University for the holiday period.  Despite being a snot monster my spirits were lifted and I arrived at the local footy ground in good heart.   This was the start of another busy day as I had another gig to attend afterwards, ideally I would like 5 goals, some good tunes and a sound night's sleep before 2 weeks of work-free doofing began - here we go, here we go, here we go.

So at the ground, I grabbed a cuppa and chose my viewing spot, a Buzzard, a Grey Heron and 4 Ring Necked Parakeets flew overhead as the teams entered the fray, I was keen to see a good match along with the other eager beavers, a festive goal glut would be nice, ho, ho, ho - into the report we go!

The start was both steady and controlled with both teams slowly feeling their way into matters and assessing what their opponents had to offer.  The first assault on goal of any import came via the hosts.  No 7 (Ryan Briody) was located out on the flank, the cross that was delivered found the noggin of No 9 (Daniel Egan) who propelled the ball off target from a very close-in position - in truth it could easily have been the opening goal.  The same team were soon looking to amend this early miss with Briody providing another cross that was met by an ineffectual toe poke toward goal.  The guests gathered deep and looked to break, No 7 (Josh Lane) raced over the dampened turf, he was unlucky to get the ball stuck under his feet and see some throbbing potential disappointingly wither into the cold annals of 'what could have been'.

A Redwing parted the air overhead as Wythenshawe held good possession on the pitch, they won a corner after much eye-catching movement.  The globe was delivered, No 3 (Luke Worth) dashed in and nutted just shy of the sticks.  Interest was now rising, a flock of Goldfinch tinkled overhead and a Lesser Black Backed Gull glided by on lazy wings as a long hoof up for the home team saw Briody gather, turn and clatter - alas once more the globe strayed off target and the guests feathers remained unruffled.  

A battling midfield melee saw Wythy's No 8 (Louis White) leave the mush and knock a long ball to the far post that No 10 (Arron Hevingham) tried with all his might to head home - darn the neck that refused to elongate and help grab the first goal.  Wythenshawe were playing some good football here, another toe poke to the far stick saw the ever-active Briody arrive just too late and then, against the general swing, Eccleshall won a free-kick.  The ball was struck long, No 9 (Ryan Baxter) nutted back across the face of goal and watched as a colleague could only head the ball straight into the arms of the awaiting keeper - now that could have been a real smash and grab moment!

The half ended with Eccleshall reborn.  A claim that the home keeper handled the ball outside of the box was waved away, from the resultant corner in-box havoc ensued with the keeper punching the ball away in desperation and his defensive ranks scrambling around like cockerels with  their chuffs on fire.  Another angled kick came, a drive towards goal blocked at the last and then Wythenshawe had one last surge but the Eck stood as firm as ever and we went into the break void of goals.

I stayed put for the break, listened to a Robin sing in a nearby tree and watched 2 Magpies noisily chase one another whilst a brace of Carrion Crows flew off into the increasing murk with great indifference.  I indulged in some Yoghurt Raisins and contemplated which way this match would swing.  I had not made a pre-match prediction, I think it was a wise move, this was very much a tough game to call.

Half two soon began, the home lads attacked without further ado, Hevingham mailed a flawless cross that Briody latched onto at the far stick.  One touch was had, the keeper sprawled and did his bit and into a short, fragmented period of play we went.  From the dislocated session Hevingham for Wythy advanced and was dragged down on the edge of the box.  Briody sent forth a low grass-skimming shot to the bottom corner that saw the visiting No 1 (Louis McCarthy) do well to save. 

Back and forth the play continued until the hosts pushed and were surprisingly caught with their trousers down as a long boom ball was returned and the resident defence stood still whilst hollering for the salvation of the offside flag.  The liner was not convinced, No 7 (Josh Lane) for Eccleshall was not to be deterred, dashed on, picked his spot and put the ball past the keeper and into the net.  0 -1 and the game was now definitely...on!

The onus was now on the Amateurs to grab the game by the globes and squeeze out the pips of potential and see to it that they impregnate the promise and help give birth to a bouncing bundle of success.  The first grip came, Egan to Hevingham and on to Briody who wasted no time, cut in and boomed...over.  Soon after the apical component of the previous move had another effort which again had too much uplift but the hope was renewed, Eccleshall needed to be on it and on it they were.  As Wythenshawe continued to push their opponents dug deep.  A ball was won, one pass played and in stepped No 11 (Bradley Carr) to double the lead.  This was the ultimate kidney punch to the hosts, they doubled up with disgust but refused to buckle, down the home stretch we went with high effort from both squads and a pleasure to behold.

As we raced through the final 20 minutes shots came each way, the home lads put together some delicious passing moves but only to be met by flying resistance and the debilitating emotion of frustration.  Just prior to the end a quite scintillating move saw Wythy's No 2 (Christopher Howard) released.  I thought a goal was on the cards and a shake-up of the scoresheet was going to make for some real hectic final thrusts.  Alas the ball, when clattered, kept on rising and the last clutch of the straw was taken - soon after the full time whistle signalled the end and we were left to watch one team walk off wondering how the hell they lost this and the other team hold their heads high, happy with their game plan and effort put in.  Despite Eccleshall winning this one the Man of the Match goes to Wythenshawe Amateurs No 10 (Arron Hevingham) who played an absolute belter of a game, sent forth many quality balls, was always looking to play a neat flick or inventive pass and who, at times, seemed unplayable.  In truth, this was one of the best solo performances I had seen this year, he was unlucky to be on the losing side.

FINAL THOUGHT - Wythenshawe Amateurs are now languishing in 17th position in the North West Counties League Division South - I am 100% sure this doesn't reflect how good this side are and is not where they will end up.  Today, it was in front of goal where they came unstuck with that finishing sharpness just not there.  From the rear to midfield and just beyond they played some quite impressive pass and move football but, as is all too frequent at this level, it was at the fore, when a chance became apparent, that impetus was impeded and a certain final accuracy just abandoned ship.  If the team fail to correct things they could be the winners of the greatest unfulfilled potential award for this campaign.  I am sticking my arthritic neck out here and predicting a top half finish, I believe but does anyone else.  Eccleshall FC are akin to freshly baked conkers and are a sincere tough bastard to crack.  They are the Times Crossword puzzle of the league, they pose many problems and very few teams are coming up with the answers - they are a well compiled unit and offer many cryptic challenges in every area of the pitch.  One thing though is easy to pinpoint and that is the relentless work rate put in, an ethos exemplified today by many players, particularly their No 8 (Jordan Benton) who dashed about like a ferret with an arse full of steroids.  I am very happy to see this team turn a corner after some real struggles over the previous years and a trip back to Perhsall Park is very much on the cards.  They have played a few more games than most of the teams around them but for Christmas Day everyone involved with the club can be happy that the current 5th place is thoroughly well-deserved.