Wednesday 8 May 2024

A DATE WITH MICK'S KNUTS

4th May 2024 - St Michaels DHFC 1 v 1 Knutsford Town - Up and out to Stockton Heath we went.  My belfry was given a new artistic embellishment via the tattooing gent Callum of Dawson's Tattoo Company.  Today it was two Magic Mushrooms enhanced by a couple of love and anarchy signs - tha' gotta get thy ethics right tha' knows - this system has turned to shit, we need to seek more cranial anarchy and infuse more love (hey and I ain't a hippy).  From here we sought some food and had a fine breakfast, a good brew and a chat before heading to this nearby ground and seeing what the crack is. 

Upon arrival we were greeted by two of the home teams ruling guard and granted a free brew, how ruddy lovely.  We had a quick look around the perimeter of the playing surface and recorded (come game end) 33 wildlife species.  The set up looked splendid, the game was featuring two closely matched teams and I fancied a 2 - 2 draw.  We chose our viewing positions and soon after the teams entered the fray.  The clouds were grey, there was a chill waiting to nip at the nethers, I was hoping for some hot action to keep the thermal energy high.

The game opened up with the hosts having an early free-kick but Knutsford standing firm.  The opening sequences were tighter than the grip of a chimpanzee's fist on a sex banana with the home team, if anything, just shading matters.  The first shot of note came via the guests after No 4 (Graeme Brotherton) fed No 6 (Jonny Cavannagh) who turned quicker than Dr Jekyll and let fly a punt that only warmed the palms of the awaiting No 1 (Ryan Cornes). A swift break came, a ball out wide and a touch placement pass saw SMDH No 8 (Connor Wood) chance his shank with the shot getting deflected wide.  The corner was awful. 

From here we witnessed a free-kick come the Knutsford way with another poor delivery had.  The game was hard to call as things stood with the first strike gaining in importance by the second.  Cavannagh for the Knutty Boys tried to grab the opener soon after but the low dandelion decapitator was straight at the watchful mittman.  Boo hiss, up the weeds!
 
After more constipated midfield battling Knutsford eventually strung a  few passes together that ended with an in-box collision.  The whistle-wielding man in the middle wasted no time in awarding a penalty, a decision I thought to be a trifle harsh. Cavannagh stepped up to take the spot kick and absolutely nailed it - the game was crying out for a strike, now matters would hopefully develop further and with heightened excitement.
 
The St Michaels crew now dug a little deeper, the reaction was good but all advances just lacked that final masterclass quality.  The half raced away, the hosts tried to force their way back into this one but the guests were niggardly and remained a quite watertight unit.  Little in the way of enthusing action came and so the nib of my pen was allowed a rest from paper scrawling duties - a coffee was needed and when the referee called a halt to the first 45 full advantage was taken.
 
A brew, a wander, a stretch.  This was a darn good area to watch a game of football and  the verdant surroundings were not wasted on our roving eyes.  It looked as though the list of grounds to revisit was growing, these 52 weeks in a year and limited seasons are in no way helpful to the eternally keen - I best get myself a ruddy diary.
 
And to half 2 with Knutsford straight on it via their No 2 (Harrison Wooley) who put in a low cross that Cavannagh connected with but failed to steer the ball past the mitter.  Straight down the other end we went, Wood tried to place a shot and get matters all squared up but the globe looked to be more interested in staying airborne and floated over the bar.  St Michaels now worked up a great lather, a corner was won but the execution was too complicated for the team's own good.  
 
Onus was now on the hosts to speed matters up and bag that equaliser whilst being wary enough not to concede a second.  Talking of which - No 22 (Brandon Blades) of the visitors had two efforts that nearly knocked the stuffing out of the opposing ranks but thankfully both efforts failed to penetrate the meshing.  A long ball by the SMDH team saw No 16 (Jack Hunter) connect with his bonce and the ball go past the keeper and bounce towards the goal.  Alas for all the home faithful a Knutsford defender was there who knocked behind for a corner from which there was little end product.
 
As a quartet of Greenfinches flew by, my eyes were distracted.  I looked back to the pitch to see a SMDH flick pass release Wood who was left with an option to shoot.  The option was indeed taken and a superb rasper-jasper of choice quality was the result with the game now all on a par.
 
The home lads now increased the threat, No 10 (Ben Mahoney) was out wide, touched the ball back to No 2 (Matthew Watts) with the ensuing shot going over the bar.  No 7 (Dominic Brereton) had a pop from the angle mere minutes later, the result was just off target.  With tails up the hosts pushed the issue, a free-kick followed, No 5 (Connor Greenfield) posted a turf-grazing drive that was mighty close to snatching the lead.  Knutsford had a brief moment of respite when a corner was won, the ball was knocked straight out of play and a player collided with the upright and needed a few minutes to recover.  Thankfully the young fellow was fine and dandy.
 
The game continued, the St Michaels lads pressed with a move that opened up the Knutsford ranks like a tin of Bartlett Pears.  Brereton was the apical component, the shot that came was too high, in truth it should have been better. The game was now wide open, the hosts worked positions and had several digs at the target but each and every one lacked true zip and, the all important 'accuracy' factor. Watts had a great chance but the header was at the keeper and then No 12 (Charlie Rodick) had a dig from the angle for Knutsford but the ball just flew across the face of the goal.  
 
Into the dog ends of the game we dropped, little in the way of a glorious chance came until Blades for Knutsford had a pop from the mush with a header off the line, saving the hosts bacon and eventually proving to be a real life saver as the game ended all square soon after.  This had been a good contest with two perfectly matched outfits.  The Man of the Match was a difficult prospect but going on all round consistency during the game I think Knutsford's No 6 (Jonny Cavannagh) deserves the nod.  A footballing brain at work and always looking to keep his team controlled, organised and making the most of all options.  Tidy work.
 
FINAL THOUGHTS - And so, another game done, another new ground visited and some wildlife recorded.  What more could one ask - a warm welcome, decent weather, a well-balanced game - ah yes - how about a Chesterfield Sofa on which to watch the game, free champagne and a free ride on a homosexual ostrich at half-time.  hey ho.
 
The teams today looked to be both decent units for this level and I would be very much surprised if anyone gave them a real whipping. It was though, perhaps in an oh so subtle way, a game of two halves.  Knutsford had the better of the first 45 and if they could have bagged a second strike then maybe, just maybe, 3 points could have been theirs.  This team have gone through many highs and lows, they are doing ok this time around and have recently bagged a cup.  Some good souls run this club, here's to consistency, success and a bit of luck as per.  St Michaels DHFC have a good set up here and it is backed up by a tidy team on the park.  They started very slowly today and like an arthritic after a night in bed with a rectal raver, just couldn't get going.  They warmed up nicely for the second stint though and looked very good value for grabbing the full prize for their efforts.  Alas the shooting boots were left unpolished and they had to settle for a decent, and a fair, draw.  As said, we gotta get back here and support a good set up - I am stretched so thinly I am almost transparent - cripes imagine that - a see through scrotum - ooh I could keep my pet fish in it - splash, splash - whoosh.

No comments:

Post a Comment