YELLOW FEVER KEEPS HEY AT BAY

16th December 2017 - Ashton Athletic 3 v 0 Abbey Hey - Winter has character, it is a season to enjoy in many ways but the fact remains that this time of year is no good for those with tender testicles, titties that are prone to frostbite or those who enjoy non-league football.  I am in no doubt that many a fan sees their Saturday morning leisure time invaded by regular checks of the local fixture list and perusals of the numerous twitter feeds to see if their local game has survived the weather, and if not, any back up plans can be cultivated.  For we wanderers, who pick and potter, it is a testing time especially if one prefers to plan in advance, I just wonder how the players and officials cope with all the upheaval.  So, after waking up early following the previous nights DIY gig, nipping to the tip and having some dinner, the web waves were wandered and a location chosen that was given the go-ahead.  We wrapped up warm, set out and, after a steady drive down we stepped into the bracing air and prepared from this Premier Division clash.  Tea was purchased, a pie for me, a mint Aero for my best mate and we picked our peeping positions.  Prior to kick off my wife had a read of her book, 'The Hustler' and I contemplated the clash ahead whilst being infected with those corned Christmas tunes that blared over the tannoy - bah humbug.  The teams appeared into the damp December air, come on lads, give us a classic!

Ashton were out and at it quickest, No 10 (Joel Brownhill) pilfered the ball from the relaxed Hey No 3 (Jonathon Hardy) and executed a pass.  A cross followed, nothing came of it but the tempo was certainly set and the touchpaper glowing.  The home lads came once more, No 2 (Jacob Jones) working hard, cutting in and laying the ball off to Brownhill who, swiveled on a cockroaches conkers and let loose a tidy shot  The goalkeeper stayed alert and got down and muddied and held on to the mucky ball - get the Daz Automatic ready for half time lads, this is looking a dirty one.  A response to the assertive play came from The Hey, No 11 (Daniel Heffernan) somehow found himself in front of goal with time to pick his spot.  He looked, hoofed and yet only drove right at the gloved guardian who did well to hold the ball and offer no further chance.  These opportunities can come back to haunt one and when Ashton flew down the other end and their No 11 (Marcus Cusani) finalised a fluid attack with a dipping shot the worst was nearly realised. Luckily for the visitors the ball didn't drop quick enough and stayed mere millimetres above the bar.  A silky move followed, it was The Yellows again, Jones fed a colleague who released to Cusani.  The shot flew forth, again the goalkeeper saved low, the move deserved so much more.  The Ashton bench was now highly animated, frustration was inflaming matters and voices boomed with advice and fuck-laden messages of encouragement.  Abbey Hey were the cause of the irritation, they were working hard and throwing a blanket on Ashton's rising hopes.  This however didn't stop the impressive No 7 (Joshua Nicholson) from jinking in and blasting a cross that saw a fortunate defender hoof the ball over his own bar from mere inches out.  The lucky bugger breathed a huge sigh but had to be on his guard as Nicholson led another charge that culminated in a blazing nipple crippler from Brownhill.  The home mitter, who was having a sound game, was in the right place again and saved with confidence.  

The dying embers of the first half and Ashton were ruling the roost.  Disputed play, a free kick, a penalty shout - all potential game changers but all passing into the ether.  A rattling shot from No 9 (Dale Korie-Butler) at an acute angle had pace but, yes you guessed, the visiting No 1 (Ross Heywood) did the business and saved the day.  The ensuing corner was below par but this didn't detract from a compelling match with both teams holding their own.  A late free-kick for the hosts saw No 6 (Charlie Munro) have a shot deflected wide and once more, the follow-up corner produce no end prize.  The ref halted matters, no goals but entertaining stuff nonetheless.

Tea and chocolate coins for half time, well it is nearly Christmas.  The chill was now attacking parts that even certain beers can't reach let alone the pesky hands of Rolf Harris, ooh me gussets.

The teams returned onto the scarred emerald, once more Ashton started with the keenest edge with Cusani running and shooting and winning a quick corner.  The cross in was fine enough, the header a little too late thus forcing the ball to fly too high.  A late tackle was the next notable action, No 10 (Adam Farrand) of Abbey Hey the perpetrator.  Pushing, dissent and general griping ensued along with 2 bookings, would a lack of discipline ultimately decide the outcome of this game?  I certainly hoped not.  Both teams huffed and puffed like Hippo's in a love shack but with no real end impregnation of the scoresheet taking place.  Cusani for the hosts was a constant mither and sending the opposing force this way, that way, and t'other.  A ball was put in, a shot was blocked on the line, Ashton were passing well, Abbey Hey living life on the back foot.  Korie-Butler had the next crack at goal but only found the side netting.  There seemed a goal imminent, I could feel it in my water, even though it was frozen and I was in danger of pissing ice cubes.  

Eventually Abbey Hey started to claw their way back into matters and after 2 corners and a nut on goal by Farrand it looked as though the tide may just well turn.  These thoughts were quickly banished as the Athletic came, No 16 (Daniel Smith) connected with a cross and struck the bar.  The ball came out, Korie-Butler found it at his feet and duly executed a sublime lob over the keepers head and into the awaiting mesh.  It was going to take a fine strike to break the deadlock, this was just such an effort.  The home bods were invigorated, they moved like Jack Russell's on laxatives.  A run, a sweet lay off and No 17 (Jamie Harrison) let fly.  The save that came was via the fingertips and kept Abbey Hey still in this one, just!   Hey tried to reassert themselves and heaved on, Nicholson for the Athletic led a counter-attack with eye-catching speed.  He played the ball out wide, a cross came and Smith nutted home with consummate ease.  Job done.  In the final minutes Ashton were still in the driving seat and on the 90 minute mark a speedy free-kick was delivered and up stepped Korie-Butler to grab his second, his side's third and to make sure the home victory was complete.  Abbey Hey had a chance of a consolation in the added time but No 15 (Regan Jarrett) tapped wide and added to the visitors overall disappointing day at the office.  The whistle came, I pondered a man of the Match and opted for No 5 for Ashton Athletic, namely (Ben Cartwright) who played a quite solid game and put pay to any chance Abbey Hey had of hitting the net.  He had good control throughout and concrete discipline and for me, contributed to an all round solid team stint.

FINAL THOUGHT - I enjoyed today's trip back to Brocstedes Park and witnessed a good home side who certainly have more to offer this season and will notch up a good run of victories if the ball runs kind.  There seems a good camaraderie going on, a decent understanding of one another's roles and a willingness to work as a compact unit.  The set up at the ground is friendly, the location not too far from home and, I hope, at some point this season to be back there again.  Abbey Hey are a puzzle and are another of those teams that never seem to meet their full potential.  They have a good unit with many well equipped players and just need a lucky break or two to get the form on a roll from which they can build.  These are competitive leagues though, who knows what will happen one week from the next and how each team will do.  It is how we like it I am sure and why we dither in the cold and indulge ourselves in something very, ruddy real.  Keep at it, keep warm, keep enthused.