SUICIDE CLUB

7th September 2019 - Cheadle Heath Nomads 1 v 4 Sandbach Utd - The crack of the morn was penetrated by my good self as I rose, had a quick breakfast and went down to the Nomads ground with my good lady to do a bit on the nature area.  It was looking good, during the day 10 species of hoverfly were seen buzzing about, 2 bee species, a few other bugs and 3 Small White Butterflies - things are slowly getting there.  After my missus buggered off to do her chores I chatted most of the morn and didn't get as much done as I should have - hey ho, nowt wrong gasbagging with some decent folk.  After tidying up and going home for dinner and a change I watched a bit of 'Konga' (a film about a giant gorilla that surprisingly has a todge that is indiscernible) and set off to the ground for the day's football.  A cuppa, a stroll around the flowerbed counting bugs and a chat with the local photographer and ruddy fine gent Mark Torbitt.  During the chat Mark revealed he had several tattoos of Eamon Andrews on his legs and that every Friday he makes all his family take part in a 'This Is Your Life' re-enactment.  He asked me if I would like to be the next guest to receive the red book, it sounded interesting until he insisted I do it nude - I politely declined and kept the conversation on football and hoverflies.  Eventually I settled by buttocks in the newly built stand and was joined by one bloke to view proceedings - this is what went on.

Nomads began this game with an impressive impetus, the early passing and pressure was of a team rejuvenated after a run of hit and miss results.  The first attack came, it was of rapier speed, No 2 (Thomas Rogers) put in a choice ball, No 10 (Ashley Stott) made a subtle but effective touch, No 11 (George Blackwell) had a decent pop that the keeper held with highly adhesive hands.  Patience was shown by the home predators, eventually a corner was won that was delivered long and knocked down.  The ball was loose, a Nomadic toe jabbed, it was Stott with a poacher's instinct - the hosts were 1 goal to the good and fully deserved it was.  Sandbach were not allowed to settle, this was a commanding start from the hosts and soon after the lead was nearly doubled when No 9 (Daniel Browne) exposed some silky feet and put the ball into the area labelled 'hazardous'.  A leg swung and struck fresh air, Blackwell found himself with room to fire, the ball was propelled forth, it went millimetres wide of the vertical (as it turned out this was a critical moment).

Eventually the Sandbach pack started to gain some possession although a back to back corner and free-kick were quickly confined the bin marked 'bilge', a place best avoided if the truth be known.  No 7 (Kieren Herbert) dashed for The Nomads next, great work, sweet pass, corner earned.  The delivery from the angle was laden with menace, the visitors did mighty well to clear, break and win a corner of their own.  No 11 (Stuart Crilly) hoofed inwards, No 2 (Matthew Pearson) flicked on, a clearance was rather desperate.  

Herbert dashed again for the hosts, a shot was blocked, another deflected behind for a corner.  The ball entered the box, No 5 (Luke Taylor) rose but his attempt with the bonse was off balance and the net left untroubled.  Pearson replied with a pilfering on the wing, a strong run and a low hard cross, the home keeper held well.  Soon after the same player was sent to the sin-bin for crimes against the decency of the game and whilst repenting his sins he saw his team defend a corner and clear a header off the line - now that could have been a real double whammy.

The back stretch saw Herbert have a chance to pull the trigger in the box, miss his moment and then Sandbach actually came on strong whilst reduced in numbers.  The guest number 9 (Thomas Powell) snuck in on the blind side, pulled back to Crilly whose shot was to tame to cause the man between the sticks any great concern.  No 10 (William Goodwin) ended a sweeping move next with a drive wide, this was a good response for sure.  No 7 (Jack Hart) kept the tide flowing one way with a shot that lacked welly and then Crilly played a mouthwatering ball that allowed Powell to chase only to be beaten by the alert No 1 (Aaron Tyrer) for the home team.  Eventually Nomads found themselves pushing once more but then dashing back as Sandbach broke with razor-cutting urgency.  Pearson flew, a cross from the depths of the corner came, Powell provided the deftest touch, suddenly this game was all square and we headed into the break with many conflicting emotions.

I stayed put for the break and nattered with a  Stockport County fan.  He was enjoyoing what was going on and looked keen to return, it is a blessing to hear such good news, it is a tough old game trying to get folk to support these spit and sawdust football teams.

The second half started with Sandbach having a spring in the step whilst Cheadle hustled away trying to get their noses back in front.  Below par shots came at each end and then Goodwin was released for the visitors via a smart ball from the back.  Rogers kept pace with the attacker, held his ground and produced some real high-class defending and saved, what could have been, a situation stickier that the goolies of Boris Johnson when asked to explain the definition of 'honesty'.  This was a touch and go affair, some peppered tackled were now thrown into the molten brew, many a hollering gob could be heard trying to get that little extra out of the game and then...!  The ball was loose in midfield, No 4 (Ashley Crank) displayed high hunger, lunged at the ball and lunged again.  Two feet were off the ground, the referee was a witness to it all, the defender was shown a red card, it was a suicidal stroke across the throat of the Nomadic tribe and really turned this game on it's reeling head.

The game continued, both teams fought now for different reasons, as Nomads battled a ball came back over the top of their back line.  Time stood still, Goodwin for the Sandbach squad nipped in,  The home keeper saw the danger, duly advanced, a lob came, it was spot on - the lead had been bagged.  Soon after the kick-off the guests gathered possession through No 14 (Kieren Garner-Knapper) in a relatively harmless position.  The player with the globe at his feet darted down the line, cut in, momentarily lost possession, regained, eyed his spot and slapped the ball home - 1 -3 - a fine goal but in truth, it was made easier than it should have been.

Shit or bust time now came for the trailing team, 2 subs were made, it made little difference with Sandbach nearly grabbing a forth and then doing just that via a penalty after No 16 (Thomas Williams) went down in the box after the merest contact.  No 5 (Oliver Jepson) took the penalty and buried with aplomb - the 3 points were had, a Nomadic renaissance was unthinkable as they ran out of ideas, gas and just plain old luck.  On a brace of occasions the home keeper went walkabout and just about survived and then the No 3 (Adam Stuart) was sin-binned due to some verbal overspill.  As Sandbach came forth Taylor for the hosts stood firm and disciplined but it was all irrelevant and the final whistle eventually came and the distorted scoreline was set in stone.  Man of the Match for me goes to the Sandbach Utd No 2 (Matthew Pearson) simply due to his versatility, blatant danger when going forward and reliability when playing in a deeper role.  He was a great contributor to the turnaround - well played lad.

FINAL THOUGHT -  1 - 4 was in no way a reflection of a game between 2 teams very closely matched.  A few decisions were crucial, one or two were certainly debatable and the fair arse of Lady Luck failed to fart any favour the way of the hosts.  For 30 minutes the home team were marvellous - energetic, cohesive and full of spirit, the fact that they only got one goal in front during this dominant period was a deciding factor and answered many questions as to the way the game would go.  The sending off at 1 -1 was a killer blow and totally unnecessary but there ya go, shit happens, it is there to be sniffed at and leaned from, the trouble is, the season is progressing and that learning curve had better be quick.   Sandbach Utd may have been under the cosh for 30 minutes but they hung on in there, produced a sharp and effective counterpunch and in some ways knocked a bit of stuffing out of their opponents.  After the sending off they took full advantage of the situation and the few decision that went their way and bagged a good win on the road which, may just be the turning point in their season.  This Non-League lark is utterly fascinating and where these two teams will end up in one of the most competitive leagues in recent years is anyone's guess - bloody brilliant isn't it!