Tuesday 29 December 2020

GREG'S GRIPPED OFF

28th December 2020 - Manchester Gregorians 2 v 3 Royton Town - Up early, out to a Nature Reserve and then a walk around a reservoir.  The good lady's phone was checked and it turned out that the planned football was cancelled due to snow.  We had a back up in the form of the Manchester Gregorians and so after arriving back at the car we made the 40 minute journey to the Belle Vue Leisure Centre and met up with STP Stu.  A short drive to Subway was needed for brews and some cookies and back to the ground we went with a wander across the main stadium to the ground at the far side of the complex.  Local gulls glided by after a trip to the tip, folk began to wander forth to get their football fix and we chatted with a fine guy whose grandson was playing for Royton.  One of the subjects that came up was cricket and we discussed several old players including Bishen Bedi, the man with a top-knot turban, a deadly spin bowling action and, believe it or not, a corkscrew nob.  In fact Bishen once opened 21 bottles of wine in 1 minute using nothing more than his twisted todge - a record that still stands to this day despite several recent attempts made by Steve 'Spiral Sausage' Jackson - impressive hey? 

Eventually, as the chill began to bite, the teams appeared, warmed up and took up their positions.  This was not a day to hang around and at 1pm the game was afoot and with fingers akin to a set of chilled chipolatas I began to scribble an account of what went on.

Royton made the early running with slick passing and great eagerness.  No 11 (Ethan Sutcliffe) was soon in, a shot came as did a block with the resultant corner giving way to bugger all.  No 5 (Jack Worrall) had a free-kick soon after that took a deflection and pinged off the vertical - now that was unlucky.  Royton continued to play some sugar-sweet football on the deck whilst The Gregs were still not with it and just scampering around like a flock of anally thrushed up chickens - a nasty scenario for sure.

Several quick passes came from The Town, carving apart the Greg's rear like a rectal doctor with a scalpel.  No 9 (Liam Wood) pounced, turned swiftly and released with the ball narrowly flying shy of the stick.  A penalty shout came next, the referee was disinterested and then Gregs burst from the set neutral gear with a choice ball that saw No 9 (Josh Ripley) escape and only have the keeper to beat.  An attempt at a pseudo-lob came, it was, in truth, ruddy awful.

The guests were shocked by this scare into double-quick action.  A touch over looked as though it had been buried but brought groans from the onlookers as it the ball fell behind the meshing and then a gratis gift was posted with accuracy but No 8's (Joe Gidley) nut was pushed away with relative ease.  From the corner a brace of shots ensued, the mittman saved both and gave his team a much needed breather.

The Manc Lads eventually gained a spell of possession, No 7 (Abdo Addow) looked an option and Ripley was always willing.  The opposing force though defended in packs and gave the hosts very little pause for thought.  To be fair the home team had a great chance to open the scoring account when a delicious ball was sent forth with No 15 (Will Reynolds) nipping in but only managing to touch over.  This was a half of misses for sure.  

The minutes flew by, no breakthrough was to be had.  Royton had a shot blocked and a toe poke nearly squeezed through the keepers legs and then the Gregorians saw Ripley welly over and a corner cause trouble for the keeper that was eventually dealt with.  We stayed at a bugger-all draw for the break but this had been a good encounter thus far.

The break was brief, there was no time to dash, flash and splash which may have been a blessing.  The inner golden liquid was the only thing keeping me warm and I am sure the locals didn't need to see a depressed wintry walnut pointing their way - what a considerate chap I am.

Half two and what could we expect well...

The first attack came via Royton, No 2 (Will Morgan) was calling out wide and a pass was made but it just had a little too much zip for the hollerer to connect with.  The same team came again, Sutcliffe was in space on the flank, a chip cross saw No 10 (Travis Martin) waltz in and nut home - what a fine opening goal, just what the game needed.

Royton were now incessant,  Wood had a weak shot easily dealt with, Sutcliffe sent in a cross that caused mayhem but was dealt with and then in the middle of the park Morgan had a rush of blood, was involved in a tackle, made a gesture with his knee towards the head of the colliding opponent and a red card was justifiably shown.  Contact or no contact, you just can't do these things.  So, from a position of control and promise The Town were now a man down and within seconds salt was added to the raw and open wound.  A free-kick was given to the hosts, Addow was on it and walloped from distance with the net bulging in gratifying style - what a fine way to capitalise and grab an equaliser.  As soon as my pen left paper I looked up to see the resident ranks charge forth again.  A stunning cross came, the header that followed was choice - 2 - 1 it was in a couple of minutes of madness.

Now Royton had to respond and respond they did.  A flank foray came, No 4 (Simon Wilkinson) for the Greg's lunged and was given a red.  The free-kick came, the ball entered the box, Wood rose, bang - 2 - 2 - now that is what I call counterpunching - Archie Moore, eat yer ticker out!

My ballpoint was now ablaze (no this isn't a euphemism) and duly exploded in excitement as Royton came again, Worrall put in a world class pass and Wood buried to complete a swift, all-action, nipple-bursting turn-around.  What an outrageous period of football.

The game flashed on, Wood for Royton was in again, this time the keeper denied him the pleasure of a mesh bulge.  Worrall followed up and looked to bag a goal of his own but the shot was laden with over enthusiasm and flashed over the bar.  By ruddy crikey, this was all go!  

The trailing team now summoned an onslaught, a ball was delivered, Ripley was on it - the shot was a fraction too high to trouble the goal zone.  At last a settled period came, I blew on my tip to keep it cool (now, now you corrupt minded gits) until a Gregs corner saw a header saved and then Reynolds stride up to bury.  The outcome - wide!  Ripley for the hosts went on a barging run soon after, beat 2 markers and put the ball on a plate for No 12 (Ismael Suleiman) to twat forth - again the shot lacked accuracy and 'oomph'.

The leading squad now passed and had some good ball retention, No 7 (Craig Schumann) had a wild pop over and Wood was unfortunate not to bag another but all the while time was being assassinated and that would do for the team in front.  Before the final peep though the home lads pushed twice more.  Suleiman had a side footed shot rise too high and then a late cross saw No 8 (Joe Copeland) sneak in and put noggin on globe.  It was a golden chance to get a share of the spoils, the only prize he deserved though was a golden shower - a bad miss methinks.

The game ended seconds later, this had been a cracker with many good performances and some good football.  Man of the Match goes to Royton Town's No 11 (Ethan Sutcliffe) for just an all round awareness, well-oiled movement and for being the eternal gripe in the opposing team's gears.  A very good effort and part of a well-drilled team display.

We 3 watchers pootled home perished but pleased - it had been a rewarding day out, we shall return.

FINAL THOUGHT - a game that was won by the best team on the day but which could easily have gone the other way.  A few moments of madness, some good passing and an all round fine example of 2 non-league teams striving to play decent football instead of humping and lumping.  Manchester Gregorians took too long to get into their stride today and were out-hustled by a quick team who were really up for this.  The host pack need to make sure for the next game they are out of the blocks mighty quick and that they play the full-width of the park and keep the communication up throughout the 90 minute spell.  I may just be on the side-lines to report what transpires - you have been warned ha, ha.  Royton Town were bang on today and had me wondering what the Hell they were doing in 12th position in the league before this game.  On this evidence, and if they keep a stable set-up and their discipline, they will rise in the ranks and I reckon secure a top 6 finish.  I like the football they play, the eagerness and the quick-thinking on show - I must make a date to catch this lot again and see if they are now a force to be reckoned with.  

So, a match between Christmas and the New Year and people are moaning there is nowt to do.  By heck, this was a free game of footy, was full of quality and thrills and all done for the love of it - come on sport's fans, sack the business end, get back to Planet Reality.

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